And now for the exciting conclusion…
A few moments later, my NP came in, and I would be a liar if I were to tell you that she didn't look concerned. She sat down, looked at me, immediately apologized for not leaving more information for me in regards to my initial cholesterol readings on my voicemail, and explained that it's policy to not leave that type of information in a message. I, then, said that I understood and explained that I was just like "Oh shit… am I gonna die?" She gave a little chuckle and we got down to business.
Bottom line, my triglyceride levels from my first blood test were extraordinarily high. So high, in fact (they were at 1099, normal is 0-129) that they couldn't measure my LDLs (bad cholesterol). To top it off, my initial HDLs (good cholesterol) were low. Normal is between 40 and 110. Mine were at 34. Not good, but not nearly as disturbing as my triglycerides.
While we waited for the results of the morning's cholesterol test to come in, we talked. She asked if I had drank alcohol on the night before my initial test. I told her that yes, indeed I had. I had consumed a couple beers (homebrews, I might add) and at least two, possibly three whiskeys. This revelation seemed to calm her… a bit. (Alcohol, you see, can quickly and dramatically raise your triglycerides.) I then told her that that had been my first physical since high school and that I didn't know my cholesterol was gonna be checked and that even if I had known, I didn't realize that drinking before the test was bad. I had not been told what to expect and I certainly wasn't given any instruction.
She apologized for the lack of communication and the extra hassle it had caused, and quickly (as I suspect she knew that the results from that morning's blood test would show a vast improvement) attempted to put the fear of Odin in me. She told me I was, overall, pretty fit, but that I needed to take action to lower my cholesterol NOW! She told me of all the dangers of high cholesterol and how, especially with my family history, I was particularly at risk. She even went so far as to take all of my numbers that she currently had and put them into a risk calculator. I think, however, that she was disappointed by the results. Even with my triglycerides at 1099, I only had a 3% chance of having a heart attack in the next 10 years. Pretty good odds, I'd say. She, however, didn't see it that way.
Shortly thereafter, my new results came in. My triglycerides went from 1099 to 245. Still high. My LDLs, which were now possible to check, were at 102, which is in the normal range, and my HDLs went up from 34 to 36. Better, but still low. The NP, after giving me the numbers and explaining to me what they meant, discussed a number of things I needed to change about my lifestyle including diet, exercise, smoking, drinking, blah, blah, blah. All the things you would expect. She also told me I should be taking fish oil supplements, and that doing so could cut my triglycerides in half.
So, what have I learned? I've learned not to drink for 72 hours before my next physical. I've learned that I should take fish oil (which I am actually doing). I've learned that I should take my fish oil right before bed so that I can sleep through the fish burps. I've learned, not that I didn't already know it before, that I should have more vegetables on my dinner plate than meat, which I've also actually been doing. Finally, I've learned that I will not be going back to that clinic again. Communication is key to any relationship. And while I'm certain that things would go way more smoothly for me the next time I went in, simply because I would know what to expect, it just isn't going to happen. They kinda pissed me off. Never mind the lack of communication, there was simply too much frustration and guesswork involved for my liking. And regardless of what you may be thinking right now: "Ohhhh… little baby can't go to the doctor without getting his hand held….." I assure you, I don't need someone to hold my hand and lead me around. Someone raising a hand and using it to, oh, I don't know, point me in the right direction, however, would have been pretty damn nice.
The post Explosions of the Heart, Part 3 appeared first on How to Get Rid of Things™.
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